New Laws for Cat Broadcast

Radio is not a recent technology, but it hasn’t been around forever; it was developed less than 150 years ago. Since then, radio has spurned massive amounts of progress, creating other technologies in its wake, such as television, internet, and food processors (similar to the “audio processors” used in radio, food processors were built as an offshoot).

On the other side of the same coin, radio broadcast has also always been a massive center of political and social turmoil. For instance, in the early 20th century, people who have red hair were not allowed to be on the radio, and the massive pressure from the community led to the creation of “Ginger Tuesdays.” This “separate but equal” policy was further overturned, for radio equality for people of all hair colors.

Today, we are living through a similar time. Right now, humans are the only beings allowed to broadcast. This is about to change, with a new law, allowing cats to have radio stations. The first station, WMEOW (132.1 FRB), is projected to power on next month, and some people and cats have some very strong feelings about this. One citizen was overheard saying this;

“This is outrageous. First we feed cats, we take care of them, and now they want equal broadcast rights? No way. They poop in boxes, for god’s sake.”

Other citizens are concerned with a potential reduction in radio quality; constant interruptions by hairballs would be unpleasant to listeners. Currently, only a small segment of the radio frequency spectrum is going to be made available to cat broadcasters; a rule reminiscent of the Ginger Radio Inclusion Act. Right now, instead of AM “Amplitude Modulation” or FM “Frequency Modulation,” cats may only use FRB, “Feline Radio Band”. Many cat activists are hoping that this too will be overturned.

Most radio scholars are excited about this new genre of radio entering the market. They speculate that soon, we can look forward to all-cat music stations, featuring favorites such as “What’s New, Human Being?”, “(I’ve got) The Meower”, and “Meow or Never.” Still, there is some concern that that cat talk radio will consist mainly of bad “meow” puns.

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